Blaze is cute… I envy her streetwalker outfit. Fuggin’ little slut. But let’s talk about the guys, Axel and Adam. I told JC to wipe those ridiculous fruity smiles off their faces (as they had in the original line drawings.) Damn him for making these studs clothed! Now it’s harder to fantasize. Ooh, if I got in the middle of a fuck-train with these two, we’d be a gradient!
ZEKE: As you can see, this genius thought of the sterling idea of us sharing the blog. Whatever. So what are you so anxious to blog about, my brilliant creator?
JC: Just what I’ve been up to these past few weeks. As you know, I traveled to Poland for a little over a week to visit in-laws. Krakow was beautiful architectually– but I wasn’t really into the weather.
ZEKE: Didja get lucky? Any Polish sausage stories?!
JC: None other than with my partner.
ZEKE: Yawn. Monogamy is for the weak. So what was the highlight of your trip?
JC: Discovering that the A.T.O.M. second season came out and is airing in Europe now! The animation is better and more homo-erotic than ever! Seriously, someone on staff at those studios is totally dropping subtle hints all over the place on that show. The male characters are all over each other– and there are bulge and ass shots on a constant basis!
ZEKE: Yeah, I’ve screwed them all. That Hawk guy was tiiight! We went through a whole tube of KY.
JC: Arighty then. My partner’s 12 year old cousin bought me some toys of the show. They don’t sell them in the states. And It’s still up in the air whether they’ll air 2nd season here or not. Ah well. In return, I offered to draw something for the kid. He asked for Lara Croft. I tried to make her look like Angelina.
ZEKE: Nice. That’ll get the kid through puberty. What else did you draw? Any porn?
JC: Not really. I was really in the mood to draw Streets of Rage (Bare Knuckle) characters. Of course, redesigned a little. Here you’ll see the line art for Adam, Axel, and Blaze.
ZEKE: What’s up with the modest bulges?
JC: Gimmie a break, man! These are mainstream characters! Do I have to turn everything I draw into gay porn?
ZEKE: Ooh, speaking of mainstream characters going gay, did you read X-Factor 14? They’ve confirmed Rictor and Shatterstar!
JC: Well sorta… the subject was danced around. But I will admit, it was pretty frank– moreso than they’ve been in the past.
ZEKE: You know what this means, right? Now I have to find Rictor and Shatterstar and shag them… even though they are like B-list characters.
JC: B-list would be generous. I’d say they’re lke C-list. But in other news, I’d like to announce that I just had my 27th birthday.
ZEKE: Oh, did you get laid?
JC: No, I got a puppy. Actually my partner and I have been preparing for this addition to our little family for months now. It was coincidence that the puppy was ready to come home around the same time as my birthday.
ZEKE: But you didn’t keep the little furrball around didja?
JC: No. After a few days, we realized we just really aren’t dog people. So Rush is back with his real family in Long Island. He was a very cute puppy though. I’ll miss him.
ZEKE: Ugh, another non-pornographic blog post. I can’t believe I let you do this. Take my name off this thing. It’s friggin’ lame.
JC: Hell no, buddy! You wanted it, now it’s yours!
1. What time did you get up this morning?
Well, my weiner was up all night, as usual. But I didn’t wake up officially till 1pm.
2. What did you have for breakfast?
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
Bukkake Boy-Sluts 12. Of course, that was at the adult theater. I don’t go to the legitimate movie theater because they don’t let you masturbate. Fascists.
4. What foods do you dislike?
Um… fish tacos.
5. Favorite item of clothing?
I have these fuschia undies that have a cock-ring built in.
7. What is your favorite TV show?
The program on the nature channel where they show animals fucking. You ever see hippos go at it?
8. What happened to number 6?
This shit is not funny.
9. Favorite sandwich?
10. Favorite Adult Beverage?
Can I say semen again?
11. Coke or Pepsi?
12. What was your most memorable birthday?
2 years ago, when I turned 21 for the third time. My party was at this club called Ballsweat. I broke my most guys fucked in one night record and had ice-cream cake.
13. What characteristics do you despise?
14. What is your favorite mp3 at the moment?
2 Live Crew – C’mon Babe
15. What color is your bathroom?
I refuse to answer stupid questions.
16. Favorite book?
Bukkake Boy-Sluts 7. Yeah, it’s a book too. Chapter 4 is particularly descriptive.
17. If you could go anywhere on vacation where would you go?
Tyson Beckford’s ass.
18. What fabric detergent do you use?
19. Do you have any pets?
Does my dick count?
20. Favorite sport?
21. What is your shoe size?
22. Where were you born?
In the ocean, spawned of the foam from the mighty Zeus’ severed phallus.
23. When was the last time you cried?
20 minutes ago.
24. Qualities of person who sent this to you?
Caleb is geek and an asshole because he won’t let me photograph his wang.
25. Who taught you to Copy & Paste?
Ugh, fuck u again.
There you have it. If you have any more questions, feel free to ask. Note that JC is going to Poland for the holidays and will have limited access to the internet. Not that that has anything to do with this blog becasue I, ZEKE have taken it over. Yep.
First, you’ll notice two new X-Men remixes: Nightcrawler and Cyclops. I friggin’ LOVE Nightcrawler. He’s just the cutest thing in Marvel comics, hands down. I hate how they have him studying to be a priest though. Lame. I liked the swash-buckling, smooth-talking, happy-go-lucky blueboy from the old days.
And next on good-ol’ Cyke, I chose to make him pretty damned sexy because I’m sick of people hating on him so. I feel like all my buddies who like the series all hate Scotty. I don’t mind the guy. I think he’s an important character. I wish that they’d make more fun of how he moves from one X-telepath to the next though. (Jean, Psylocke, Emma)
Then, I whipped up a little present for my boy, Patrick Fillion. Here we got Space Cadet! I originally wanted to do Demios but shyed away because I’m gonna do demons in an issue of Anti-Heroes. This Space Cadet drawing is one of few that I’ve peciled in non-photo blue. Blue pencil is good to work in because the theory is that xerox, cameras, and scanners don’t pick up the blue. That’s in theory though. My scanner picked it up. But, I will say that cleaning the blue out was much easier than cleaning out graphite.
Finally, I’ve posted the censored version of one of the new splash pages I did for Anti-Heroes#3. I put the sketch up months ago and had been working on the colors ever since. I like the way it came out. I definitely recommend starting a drawing and then coming back to it weeks later. It almost feels like touching up someone else’s work. You end up looking at it with totally new eyes.
10) Battletoads – This is more here for my BF than for me. I avoided these guys when I was a kid becasue I thought they were too much of a Ninja Turtles ripoff– (and their NES game sucked ass.) But I will admit, they had some hot bods… for a trio of frog men, that is.
9) Prince Lotor – He was the villian in Voltron. You’ll find throughout this list that I have a thing for the villians– the bad boys. I dunno what it was– maybe because I tried so hard to be good, I felt like liking the villians was somehow living vicariously through them. Anyhoo– Lotor was definetely intended to be attractive. But that cunt Princess Allura always turned down his affactions! I woulda married ya, Lotor! Especially with that incredibly monotone American voice actor they had for him! Remember that? I loved it!
8) Panthro – Yeah, when people talk about the Thundercats, all you hear is how friggin’ hot Cheetara was. Okay, yeah, she was stacked. Too bad the men weren’t! I remember thinking (even that young) that it was a travesty that none of the male T-cats had bulges. Somehow though, Panthro seemed less neutered than the rest of them. Maybe it was the voice– or his attitude. He just seemed more manly. He also used to kinda curse (Dang-Blast-it!)
7) Duffman – Yes, I am including some contemporary characters on this list. I have to admit, I was never all, “Ooh, I wanna screw Duffman!” But of all the Simpsons characters, if I had to make it with one, it’d be him. haha. Of course, not until I’ve had a couple beers!
6) James Bond Jr. – No, I’m not making this up. This was a cartoon that used to come on early in the morning in the 90’s. And yes, it’s exactly as it sounds… James Bond as a teenager: suave, womanizing, slutty, James Bond! In every episode there was some different chick he was talkin’ to. He was a player! And his themesong was like, “He’s got a job to do… while he rescues a girl!” Good ol’ cartoon misogynism!
5) Bumblebee – While all the other boys were idolizing Optimus Prime and Megatron, I was the kid always rooting for more Bumblebee airtime on Transformers. I thought he was so adorable. Yeah, he was a robot who could turn into a VW bug, but behind that metal exterior beat the heart of a needy, young, over-achiever. (ok, maybe that was taking it too far). But I did find him sweet for some reason. I also liked Starscream and Soundwave and secretly wanted them to take Bumblbee away and have their way with him!
4) The Cobra Twins – Tomax and Xamot, of G.I. Joe. Yes, the twin fetish was alive in me even 20+ years ago. They struck me as queer even back then. Maybe because I thought they were French. (American kids think all gay things are French.) I thought it was hot how they finished each other’s sentences and how if one got punched, the other felt the pain as well. I wonder if that worked the other way around? Like if you were blowing one and he spooged, would the other one just randomly orgasm too?
3) Gaston – From Beauty and the Beast. “No one’s slick as Gaston, No one’s quick as Gaston, No one’s neck’s as incredibly thick as Gaston’s.” I was sitting in the theater like, “That’s right, sing it, baby!” What the hell?! A Disney song about a hot guy reeling in his own sexiness?! Ok, I’ll take it. And the best part was when he goes, “As you see I’ve got biceps to spare / And ev’ry last inch of me’s covered with hair!” And then he rips open his shirt and shows off his hairy chest equisitely rendered way past the standard of everything else the movie.
2) Shark – On ATOM (Alpha Teens on Machines.) I can’t plug this cartoon enough. It’s really well designed. (and the characters look like mine!) And they also draw the male characters shirtless all the time and there are even some suggestive scenes thrown in here and there. Like when Shark stole Hawk’s underwear when they were swimming. It’s really fun. I urge more people to get into it (so I can find some slash art of it online someday– bwahaha.)
1) Launchpad – How did Launchpad make #1? I dunno– he’s always had a special place in my heart. Again, I didn’t think he was sexy, per se, becasue I was a little too young to think that at the time. But I do remember being very drawn to his image: the masculine chin, the height, the rippling chest. He was the REAL MAN of Duckburg! He was also the only one who wore pants too– think about that!
He was only cute on DuckTales though. When they put him on Darkwing Duck, they de-sexified him and made him all squat and balding. I was really mad about that. Yes, I know, he’s a mutha-freakin’ DUCK! But it was his image, man! I almost became a pilot becasue of Launchpad.
Feel free to comment, make additions, or tell me I’m psychotic.
As many of you know, I redesigned all my favorite mutants with cute, ostentatious, bulgy, breasty, hippy costumes. Then, I made pornographic versions of the male ones, starting with Northstar and Banshee. Continuing the theme, I animated the stills in Flash with Beast, Wolverine, Gambit, and Angel.
Next up was Colossus. I was always pretty happy with my original base drawing for the Colossus Remix. So, I was thrilled to finally get to the X-Rated version. But then, I noticed that his pose is super-similar to another Colossus drawing I did years ago. I’ve been really conscious of trying to avoid repitition in my pin-ups lately, so I almost went back and redrew the original base for Colossus Remix. But then I was like, “Fuck that, too much work.” So yeah, I’m aware that I’ve almost directly ripped myself off with this one and while that does bother me a little, I remind myself that the remixed one goes well in the series.
And yeah, I know his weenie is pretty frightening. Well, the thing is– it’s gonna HAVE to be bigger than all the rest of the guys simply becasue… duh, it’s Colossus. We just won’t think about who’s gonna take that thing. (poor Kitty!)
I remember some of the really early ones I did were freaky. Like for instance, when I was like 8, I made my own Masters of the Universe paper dolls. I don’t have them anymore but I remember they had really short legs and big loin cloths. I also made some of the KoopaKids and made up a mom for them who was basically Jessica Rabbit with a turtle head. My parents saw that and were grossed out.
In my teen years, I got really into it and started laminating them so when we played with them they wouldn’t tear. I came across them recently while going through my old stuff. These are of Mega Man and Street Fighter characters. I took liberties on some of the characters and in a lot of cases, drew them how I wished they looked.
The link to all these guys is here:
Geez, don’t you hate it when you go to a porn blog and get all excited to see that there’s a new post only to get let down when it’s some crap that’s not porn? HAW HAW. I’ll post somethin’ sexy next time– promise.
What’s up with Nintendo dissing my boy Toad lately?! He’s not playable Mario Hoops and is reduced to a race in MarioStrikers! Maaan, these were the 2 games I’ve sooo been wating for! Ever since Acme All Stars , I’ve been wanting a soccer or basketball game featuring cute characters I like with cool moves and powers.
And what do they do? Downplay the coolest character they ever came up with! I’m sorry, how does DAISY get a spot on MarioHoops and not Toad? Toad is one of the first! That’s who everyone picked to beat Mario2! And he was the man in the old Mario Cartoon, too.
So yeah, if anyone at Nintendo is reading this, note that I am not buying any more Mario games until Toad is playable again.
However, as most of you know, I’ve left Y!Gallery. There were two reasons for this mostly. The first was that I thought their rules and the enforcing of them was too vague and arbitrary. The second was that I thought that if I spoke my mind about anything I disagreed with, I’d be suspended or banned. And I really didn’t want anything like that to happen to me– not because I’d miss out on participation or anything. More because I was afraid of what I’d do in retaliation. I have a vindictive side– most people don’t see it. But if they’d pushed me, they’d have found their computers hijacked with viruses and spam galore. So I thought it was best that I just remove myself from the situation before it escalated.
I still want to find a forum like Y! but for now, I’m going to see what this bloggin’ thing is all about. If I get a similar response to what I got from the friendly Y! users, then I’ll post sketches, finished drawing, whatever! Feel free to comment. Tell me what you like, and what you want to see.
To get the ball rolling, I’m posting this new character. His name is Marq and he is the protagonist in a new series I’m working on called “Persuasions.” It’s themed like a soap opera– only sexy and gay! Marq is a sweet, straight-laced school teacher who’s married but carries on an affair with Preston, the bad-boy anti-hero of the series.